Mis(s)adventures of a Salesgirl| Read first chapter for free

Chapter 1: Germ-ination

‘Ma, we need to discard this bottle,’ Ena announced. Her mother, Rupa, was frying luchis and placing them neatly on tissue papers decorated on a huge plate. Luchi-aloo dam was their favourite Sunday breakfast—the quintessential repast of a Bengali family.
The rim of the bottle had a thin film of filth around it, the kind that tells that a bottle is old and well-used—the poetic nostalgic kind. But to Ena, it was not poetic at all. Her mind was tormented with that filth, the grime filling every crevice, every conscious part of her. She steeled herself as she had learnt to do over the past years. Then she put the bottle down without drinking from it. Rupa ignored her. Ena tried again.
‘This bottle has been in use for many years. It is no longer clean. We need to throw this away.’
‘Yeah, right!’ Rupa rolled her eyes and went on with her frying.
Ena finally took the bottle and brandished it next to her mother’s face.
‘Ma, I am telling you this is dirty! Filthy! Can’t you see?! I AM PUTTING THIS IN THE DUSTBIN!’ Rupa kept her ladle aside and confronted her daughter.
‘I am not your pishi, okay? I am not going to put up with these madness-inducing OCD habits. Do you understand?’ Picking up the plate of freshly-fried tempting luchis, Rupa stomped off, leaving Ena fuming in the kitchen.
Ma was referring to Tuki pishi, her Baba’s sister, who was big on mysophobia. And well, Pishi and Ma weren’t exactly on back-slapping terms.

‘Abhishek da is an angel few people recognize,’ Tuki pishi had described her elder brother, Ena’s baba, during her ritual mobile screen washing after returning home from outside. What with the anna prasanna incident and her aunt’s similar habits, Ena had grown up to be obsessive about cleanliness, sometimes a bit too much. ‘He is too forgiving, too kind, too good for—’ Ena knew Tuki pishi meant to say ‘for your mother’ but she had tactfully stopped. Instead, she had improvised, ‘Your mother is really, really lucky to have him.’

The story went far back. Before Ena was born. Before Baba
had married Ma.

‘They had been engaged for three years, but the wedding would have been called off had Abhishek da not been so understanding. I swear. Everyone on our side was sure it was over.’

Ena had heard about Ma’s dance tour fiasco too many times. Not that anybody had told her in so many words, but she had heard bits and pieces from her relatives from both sides of the
family and was smart enough to add two plus two. Of course, Tuki pishi had been a big help, garnishing the story with her spices.
She knew Ma had not wanted her marriage to be arranged. Ena wouldn’t have liked it either, so she sympathized with Ma. On the other hand, she loved Baba (like that could ever be in doubt!)
and wouldn’t want any other person to be her father. She also knew for sure that Ma loved Baba. Or did she?
‘So, tell me what really happened?’ she had tried one day to steer Pishi towards full disclosure.
‘You don’t need to worry about such things, shona.’ Tuki pishi had tried to wriggle out of the difficult conversation. But she was the only one who could tell her the truth.
‘Really? I am twenty-five, for God’s sake! And you can’t tell me how Ma and Baba got married? I can’t believe you, of all people, would say this!’

She was about to turn away in disgust when Tuki pishi seemed to loosen up a little.
‘Really, shona. There is not much to it. Your mom and dad were engaged while Abhishek da was in Bahrain. He was planning to come to India two years later and settle here permanently. But then it so happened that he had to stay on for another year and it was around then that the whole thing started. But it was so long ago, I don’t even remember!’
‘Why all this secrecy then?’ Ena’s tone was sharp and she felt hurt, belittled at still being thought of as a kid.
‘Well, as you know, your mother went for this performance with her dance troupe…’
Ena was not a good listener, but right then she had become a perfect receptacle, peppering Pishi’s conversation with enough pauses and appropriate responses to keep her going. She wasn’t going to pass up this chance of getting to know more about those turbulent times before Ma–Baba’s marriage.
‘They were supposed to tour the country. Rupa thought she could fit in her dance tour while Abhishek da was in Bahrain, wrapping things up to settle permanently in India. Her parents thought it only fair that your mother gets her chance to pursue her “career” before marriage. I am sorry to say that I don’t see much logic in that except a lot of arrogance on Rupa’s part, as if we were regressive enough to stop her from pursuing a career after she was married! But let bygones be bygones.
The dance tour took her to many different places; from West Bengal to Maharashtra, Chennai, Hyderabad, Gujarat, Punjab and God knows where else. It was then that she met this man. He was supposedly some brother of her best friend from the dance troupe. Meera was the friend’s name. Meera Chandran. She was from Chennai.’
Meera Chandran. That rang a bell. Aah. Of course. She was Ankita’s aunt. Ankita Gupta was arguably Ena’s best pal. They had grown up together in the same society. But she had never known of her connection to Meera aunty, who had married out of her South Indian roots into the Gupta family. Ankita was the daughter of Meera’s husband’s elder brother. But Ma had never mentioned that she had such a history with Meera!
To be fair, though, everyone knew that Ma and Meera aunty used to be part of the same dance group. It was a fact like any other, like being classmates or schoolmates at some point of time in life. ‘I can’t tell you everything. But when she came back and there was barely a month left for the wedding, we received a shocker from the family that Rupa was struck with some severe illness and the wedding would have to be postponed. Trust me, I started smelling something fishy.’ Tuki pishi’s mouth was set in a grim line of disapproval. ‘I knew there was more to it than just this illness. Maybe we shouldn’t have let Abhishek da take the stand that he took.’
‘What stand?’ Ena’s mouth was dry by now. She was suddenly feeling really sorry for Baba.
‘He agreed to wait,’ she said, throwing up her hands in frustration. ‘You see, your baba has always been too good for his own good. Too much of a simpleton, the poor fellow. But we were one step ahead of him. Through common friends and neighbours, we tried to get the actual news and discovered the ruckus Rupa had stirred up in her household. She had talked about breaking things off. She had asked for “time to think”. As if that’s not a euphemism for falling for someone else!’
‘Pishi, you can’t be serious.’
‘You don’t believe me, do you?’
‘I kind of don’t want to.’
‘Well, neither did your grandparents, who were forced to go to her to-be in-laws with folded hands to ask them to postpone the wedding. I actually feel bad for them. What humiliation they must have undergone! And that too for some stupid sales guy from Chennai working in some stupid mobile company! Salesmen are like that—deviously manipulative. Their livelihood depends on it, after all. Compare that with Abhishek da, who came all the way from Bahrain to marry Rupa!’
Well, so, that was that. Ma had fallen for some guy in Chennai who, turns out, is Meera aunty’s brother. But then she did marry Baba. Was she made to accept the marriage just because they had been engaged for three years?
‘I know what you are thinking,’ Tuki pishi’s voice was almost sympathetic as she noticed Ena’s tormented expression. ‘I assure you, Rupa was not married to Abhishek da without her consent.’
‘Well, that’s reassuring,’ Ena grimaced.
‘Ena, there is a reason why we must wait for you to grow up before—’
‘I AM TWENTY-FIVE, FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE! BY THE TIME MA WAS TWENTY-FOUR, SHE HAD GIVEN BIRTH TO ME!’
‘Okay, okay, you don’t need to get worked up! I have told you what you wanted to know!’
‘Yeah, but I don’t get why Ma married Baba when she did not want to!’
‘That only your Ma can answer.’
Ena was sure Tuki pishi was not telling her something. But she hadn’t been able to put her finger on it. Suppressing her curiosity and annoyance, she decided to find out the truth of it herself.

What to know more? Get the book here.